You Stupid Idiot

Did that title give you an emotional response? Hopefully it did or you may not read this! It can mean different things to different people. Read on to become immune to the fear of looking stupid, the fear of what others might think and your own negative self-talk.

The fear of looking stupid

The fear of looking stupid is one of the worst fears to prevent you from pursuing your goals. It’s a dream killer. We all want to be accepted by our peers. Maybe even being looked up to a little bit could be nice for a while. Many people have a stifling fear of being perceived as dumb or stupid. This can prevent you from taking any positive action steps towards your goals and may even prevent you from simply speaking up. To succeed past the point where you are at right now, this is a fear that you’ll have to learn to manage. How do I know this when I don’t know you or where you are at right now? Because to achieve more then you have currently achieved, you will have to attempt more. By attempting more you’ll have a greater risk of something not working out, i.e. potentially looking stupid to others.  

From time to time we all make mistakes. It’s impossible to know everything about everything so eventually we could catch ourselves out with an accidental display of our ignorance. Guess what? It’s a human trait to be wrong sometimes, to make mistakes sometimes, to fail sometimes. We are all stupid in regards to certain subjects. Sometimes we attempt to control events beyond our control or sometimes we attempt something that doesn’t work out for us. This is all part of learning and improving.

The fear of looking stupid doesn’t have to be a concern for someone who never attempts anything. That’s always an option. Do less, get hurt less. Play it safe and keep the head down. Attempt to go unnoticed. Risk nothing. Stay in the comfort zone. However, regret could hit you like a truck sooner or later. You could end up becoming one of the could of, would of and should of brigade.

If you feel you need to have a fear, transfer your fear of looking stupid into a fear of regret. You’re fear of regret will drive you on to do things that your fear of failure would normally prevent you from doing. Life is for living and the full range of results that entails.

Don’t pay too much attention to the opinion of others

Why do you hold the opinion of others in such high esteem? Especially those that you may not like, may not respect or have even met. Can you see how ridiculous it is to base your important life decisions on what you think other people may think? If you attempt something and friends judge you harshly, were they even real friends to begin with? You’ll have done yourself a favour by filtering them out of your life sooner rather than later. Real friends will always be supportive, provide feedback and be accepting of your goals. To live your own life free of the fear of what others might say or think is to live a life of relative free will. You will have a much stronger sense of control over your own life if you follow your own heart and mind when making your plans. Meaningless people should mean less in your life.

Reduce your negative self-talk

Maybe you are calling yourself a stupid idiot. I’m all for self-deprecating humour and being able to laugh at our own quirks. However, negative self-talk can be very damaging. Don’t let yourself away with tearing yourself down. Most people can be a lot harder on themselves than anyone else could ever be. You must live with yourself 24/7 so you may as well reduce the negative things you tell yourself. I’m not saying to substitute with false confidence. Focus more on genuine positivity instead of imagined negativity. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot before you even get started with a goal or plan.

By the way, you’re definitely not a stupid idiot because you’ve read to the end. If you were to do something stupid from time to time then that’s okay too, just don’t make the foolish mistake of forgetting to share, like and review this blog :)  

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By Roundhouse Rob, The Success Sensei

Robert Devane is a serial entrepreneur and experienced investor as well as a former martial arts multiple World champion and professional MMA fighter with over 20 years of coaching experience.

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